Let's a raise a glass to the hypocrites in all of us.
In the land of Yennaitee, it was that time of the year. The angels were raining thunderbolts. Life hung on a fine balance between Yee and Yef, the Yennaitee equivalent of Ying and Yang. And, Guevera was but forgotten. I mean what does Guevera know eh? He might know how to fire his guns but would he know how to jump between Yee and Yef? Never. Redness can go hang.
It was sometime before that the 'Silsila' of musical chairs got over. The Amazons had waged a bloody war this time. And they had come out victorious. Similar smaller battles had been fought over everywhere. And everybody had come to the conclusion that paper plantains aren't good enough for Yennaitee. It had to be the original version or nothing. Because of course, every other place in the world except Yennaitee was but perfect. And Yennaitee was indeed the hell which made your bum burn.
What to do? Different people had different opinion. Somebody said "Atom Bomb". "Let's nuke these goddamn angels. In fact, let's set everything everything on fire." Because somebody said, everybody agreed. Because come on it's somebody, so he has to be right. He is the English eh. And he is the poet eh. And he's our somebody. Now, came the question. Who?
Silence.
"Hello. Who will drop the atom bomb?"
Silence.
A shout was heard. "Yee-Yef time. Atom Bomb after."
Some others said. "In Yennaitee, we trust. Change from within." And, then they made their bums comfortable on those musical chairs. Until it grew large and dragged the chair along wherever they went. Not that they didn't try.The concept of trying to fight a rhinocerous with a needle ain't solid enough. And that's all that they had. A needle. But, Bruce Lee didn't even have a needle in "Enter the Dragon". So, try they will, they thought.
Now, in Yennaitee, there was an old saying. "Post adichu gamaya adichu post." Basically, it meant everything was the same. But, people finally realised that was wrong. Plain wrong. Because everything lies in the smoke shield. Even if you are a pipsqueak and don't know anything, just wear a moustache. Except for those Amazons. Nobody knows what they have to wear. And, so wear that moustache and act like you know it all, that you are about as old as Yennaitee itself. Then, you will be praised far and wide as God. Other tips include talk less, interfere in everything and take credit for everything.
And then there were the Cynics. Bunch of really cool people. They snickered at everything. Because of course, they had every right to do so. They would have done so much better than all these somebodies and nobodies. They were wise, these cynics. They knew that Yennaitee was bad. Might as well make fun while the hay shines. What that smile was to Heath Ledger, so too they had something. "Punjam". Except when they needed something, of course.
So, between red, blue and green, Yennaitee danced every year until Yee-Yef. And, amongst all the cobweb and mirrors and paper plantains and chairs and angels and Gods, a few of them fell for this land. For what reason, only they knew.
PS : Rumour mills suggest that in between all the Yee and Yef, they have decided to Pee on the inhabitants here. All hail Yennaitee.
In the land of Yennaitee, it was that time of the year. The angels were raining thunderbolts. Life hung on a fine balance between Yee and Yef, the Yennaitee equivalent of Ying and Yang. And, Guevera was but forgotten. I mean what does Guevera know eh? He might know how to fire his guns but would he know how to jump between Yee and Yef? Never. Redness can go hang.
It was sometime before that the 'Silsila' of musical chairs got over. The Amazons had waged a bloody war this time. And they had come out victorious. Similar smaller battles had been fought over everywhere. And everybody had come to the conclusion that paper plantains aren't good enough for Yennaitee. It had to be the original version or nothing. Because of course, every other place in the world except Yennaitee was but perfect. And Yennaitee was indeed the hell which made your bum burn.
What to do? Different people had different opinion. Somebody said "Atom Bomb". "Let's nuke these goddamn angels. In fact, let's set everything everything on fire." Because somebody said, everybody agreed. Because come on it's somebody, so he has to be right. He is the English eh. And he is the poet eh. And he's our somebody. Now, came the question. Who?
Silence.
"Hello. Who will drop the atom bomb?"
Silence.
A shout was heard. "Yee-Yef time. Atom Bomb after."
Some others said. "In Yennaitee, we trust. Change from within." And, then they made their bums comfortable on those musical chairs. Until it grew large and dragged the chair along wherever they went. Not that they didn't try.The concept of trying to fight a rhinocerous with a needle ain't solid enough. And that's all that they had. A needle. But, Bruce Lee didn't even have a needle in "Enter the Dragon". So, try they will, they thought.
Now, in Yennaitee, there was an old saying. "Post adichu gamaya adichu post." Basically, it meant everything was the same. But, people finally realised that was wrong. Plain wrong. Because everything lies in the smoke shield. Even if you are a pipsqueak and don't know anything, just wear a moustache. Except for those Amazons. Nobody knows what they have to wear. And, so wear that moustache and act like you know it all, that you are about as old as Yennaitee itself. Then, you will be praised far and wide as God. Other tips include talk less, interfere in everything and take credit for everything.
And then there were the Cynics. Bunch of really cool people. They snickered at everything. Because of course, they had every right to do so. They would have done so much better than all these somebodies and nobodies. They were wise, these cynics. They knew that Yennaitee was bad. Might as well make fun while the hay shines. What that smile was to Heath Ledger, so too they had something. "Punjam". Except when they needed something, of course.
So, between red, blue and green, Yennaitee danced every year until Yee-Yef. And, amongst all the cobweb and mirrors and paper plantains and chairs and angels and Gods, a few of them fell for this land. For what reason, only they knew.
PS : Rumour mills suggest that in between all the Yee and Yef, they have decided to Pee on the inhabitants here. All hail Yennaitee.
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